Me's

Rome was nice (above photo Arc of Constantine from Colosseum), Florance was beautiful. Apart from the first stumbling yoga try I simply did not practice. Lots of red wine and delicious pastas did not help my body too. Yesterday we were travelling for 7 hours and today all my legs felt swollen. I did practice though. But I am SO nervous.

My focus in the practice and and breathing come and go. I have a stress line between my eyebrows. If I breath correctly and imagine this breath going under this line and through my sinuses my muscles get relaxed and this line disappears. It's eather from stress or from too much thinking. I look mad when I have this line. Maybe I am an angry person. I actually have a lot of anger built in under my bones..

It's hard. 30 years being in competitive sports and building all this muscles. 30 years being among competitive people and in competitive schools and building all this ambition. About 10 years of being in save the looser boyfriend commitments.. Being angry and finding reasons and being right to be angry for maybe 30 years. It is too much to expect to get rid of anger, to stretch and relax the strong stubborn muscles, be patient and calm in such a short time. I am getting better, accepting my anger and see how my ego works. That other me I am watching is actually me. It is very hard to accept this. A part of it maybe always will remain.

I have lots of plans for December. I want to work work work, practice practice practice

This week...

I want to finish my online assignments.

Finish the foreword of my translation.

Finish the visa procedures for Berlin.

I already scheduled an appointment for visa. Hope that goes well. After all years of working for Berlin, I am so slow to do the things now. It's amazing.

This translation of mine took a lot of my energy when I was waiting for my coworker whom quit after making a delay for a year. I had to finish his part too. Now it is finished and checking up by my professor took a lot of time too. He had his reasons... but anyway. Now I am too slow! This translation is a drag and I want to send it before the year ends. I am not intending to do anymore translations...

I love my online job. We are creating a business which will be simply amazing. We are blogging the developments. It's in Turkish but can be found here.

I need to work on my foreword now and also prepare the home page of the business.

Have a wonderful December...